Heavy on my heart

First of all I would like to apologize for not keeping this blog up to date, I know that I have a lot of loyal readers and it must be a let down when there isn't anything new posted. There has been a lot going on in our life right now that has kept me from wanting to blog, which is also another reason I must apologize(this is going to get a little weepy so please bare with me). I have been keeping some things from all of you, even though we know we have many family and friends who love us dearly and pray for us often. In May we found out that we were pregnant, it was not planned but was greatly anticipated and already loved very much. But unfortunately two weeks later we miscarried, we were crushed. We did not plan for anymore but on October third we were thrilled to find out that we were going to have another baby, sadly two weeks later we miscarried again. I have been to the doctor and she doesn't feel any reason to believe that there is anything wrong with me, but we will have to wait and see! Which brings me to why we didn't tell anyone, in the past whether it's been in humor or concern comments have been made about our family's size. Yes it's obvious we are not the average size family, but we wouldn't have it any other way. We have never thought of children as burdens and while we can take a joke and are probably the most laid back people you will ever meet it's hard to be excited to tell people you're expecting when you know that you're not going to get a congratulations. So with all that said if we decide to have another child please know that we don't make this decision lightly, we know that the economy is not great right now. But we don't and never have put our trust in the world, but in God. He has gotten us through this roller coaster of emotions and I don't know what I would have done if I couldn't cry out to my Heavenly Father. I write this, if not for my own healing, to tell you if we do get pregnant I promise to post it on the blog and just ask for your support and prayer as the concern for possible miscarriage arises. We love you all and want you to be involved in our family as much as possible. Thanks for listening it has been a burden on my heart and I needed to let it go.